Last Thursday I accidentally stopped recording the Redskins game while my husband was at a work dinner. I didn’t consciously do it, the DVR has an annoying habit of changing the channel I’m watching to record 20-year-old Seinfeld episodes. I just flipped it back and entered the protect code. He was seriously pissed.
Seriously murderous is how I will feel if someone changes the channel and stops recording the Farewell Season of Oprah which premiers today.
Oprah is my cultural icon of all time. You know that question, “One person, living or dead, who would you want to have dinner with?” Mine is Oprah. If there’s “one person you admire most in the world,” again Oprah. When she does those Oprah Hook-ups the only person I want to be hooked up with is Oprah.
My mother began watching Oprah when she aired after Days of Our Lives and Phil Donahue (which incidentally, I dreamed about last night). I was, and still am, pretty sure she’s the most enlightened person on the Planet Earth.
Over the last 20-something years I’ve spent 4 o’clock with Oprah. I sit down with my snack after a long, productive day and I cry or laugh, cheer and shout, and root for my fellow humans. I root for them to win contests, cry for their sorrow and root for their resilience and healing. I shout when someone makes a dream come true, literally shout in this teary, loud way, with fists in the air, as if it were my own dream come true (which, of course is, to be a best selling author on Oprah). I listen to people honestly convey why they did a crazy, stupid and wrong thing and I allow myself to recognize a piece of me that can relate. I learn about addictions of all kinds and I can relate a little too much. I get jazzed when the people loose the weight. I buy the books and read them like delicious glasses of white wine. I take the classes offered on the website and I listened to every author in Oprah’s Soul Series and took her A New Earth teleclass. Honestly, Oprah has educated me on a million things I probably would have known nothing about. I’ve even changed my health habits in response to her Dr. Oz shows. I’ve often ridden my elliptical machine while watching Oprah, knowing she’d be so proud of me.
Some years I’ve missed her because of work, but not since the DVR was invented. I’m glad my husband never bought me the 25th Anniversary DVD set, because I’m going to need him to buy me the one they market after this year.
She’s going to start her own OWN Network and I’m proud of her. Honestly, last year I was getting worried about her being so tired, not taking care of herself and working all the time. I kept thinking I should send her a letter, telling her we’ll be okay if she quits and takes care of herself. I totally plan to subscribe to OWN. I don’t really even care how much it costs. I like her “young pups,” but not the way I love Oprah. I wonder if she’ll have a weekly show or something that will give me my Oprah fix?
I suppose the next 20 years will be like the summer, when you have to make do with old Oprah reruns and it doesn’t really matter if you miss them. Sometimes they can still make you shout and cry (like yesterday when I saw Will.I.Am. pay off two people’s mortgages). After today, the Oprah Fall Premier will never come again.
This year, at 4 o’clock you’ll find me where I have always been: watching Oprah, eating my snack, and sharing emotional and psychic space with all the other millions of people in the world doing the exact same thing. I’ll be half-sad the whole time thinking, this is the last one exactly like this.
Honey, I’m so sorry I stopped recording the Redskins game. Please don’t take it out on Oprah.
Below is an interview of Kelly Parks Snider from Project Girl by Peggy Moss. The image is a sample of art from Kelly Parks Snider titled “Commercial Land.”
What is Project Girl?
Project girl an organization that I co-founded with video producer JaneBartell. Project Girl is a national girl led initiative that combines art, media literacy and youth led activism into a movement aimed at encouraging
girls to be more critical interpreters of this world.
Project Girl helps girls become literate in all media forms-TV, internet, movies… I Project Girl helps girls become better interpreters of this world, more critical consumers. We also expect young girls to be the reformers. I believe they are the solution.
What made you start Project Girl?
The origin of an idea is often difficult to define. But Project Girl was born in a box of old stuff that I was rummaging through in a junk store. I found some old yearbooks and as I looked through the old books, I noted some comparisons between my youth and the complex lives of our children’s culture. That moment got me thinking about today’s culture, the word wars and our kids’contemporary culture, a culture that wrongfully normalizes and often glamorizes disrespect. From the moment our kids begin speaking, they are exposed to cartoon characters with big bad attitudes, negative tendencies, scowley grimaces, images of over sexualized young girls, TV shows that glamorize violence, the stereotypes perpetuated by advertisements, excessive consumption and attitudes in the media that show nothing but girl fighting and competing. I am the mother of four teenagers. It seems that the absurd has become the living reality for many of our kids. I asked the question “why”
Why are girls dissatisfied with their bodies?
Why do we stereotype?
Why are girls having trouble getting along with each other and their parents?
Why are young girls so sexy so soon?
As Jane and I talked to parents, other kids and educators there seemed to be a girl will be girl’s attitude. I found this appalling and not a true representation of the lives of the girls that we knew. We didn’t agree with this. My household is surrounded with girls, active girls, interesting and wonderfully unique girls. So we looked into it further. We started researching, obsessing, networking, going to leading thinkers around the country and asking questions, gathering information. We knew what we had to say was very important but we also know that we must say all of this in a way that youth can hear the message. When our kids were born in 1992 advertisers were spending $6.2 billion marketing to children. By the time our kids were ready to go to Kindergarten just five years later, that amount had nearly doubled to $12 billion. Now it’s over $18 billion. We felt vindicated, and angry. We also found out that in the ‘80s, right before our kids were born, kids were being exposed to 1500 commercial media messages a day. Today, that number has grown to 3,000 images. Our kids are growing up in this cultural field that’s firmly rooted in high stakes marketing. They are being shaped by it, defined by it, and in many cases, harmed by it. I realized that interrogating and thinking critically about the only culture that you have ever known can be difficult. So we collected a diverse group of girls who met once a month for a year to act as our board of advisors. The girls taught us how to say things in way girls could hear it. They taught us how to network with other girls. And most importantly, they showed us that girls are hungry to have a meaningful and significant role in improving the lives of others.
What do you dream of it becoming?
Our vision is to increase the momentum and reach of Project Girl’s youth based mobilization. We will continue to work community by community. We do this four ways:
The Project Girl Art Exhibit travels from community to community. It consists of mixed-media canvases, sculptures, multi-media art installation, and video reflections, and very importantly, art produced by local girl artists. When we bring the exhibit into a community we precede it with workshops, trainings, partnering with local organizations that serve kids. This organizes and mobilizes the community, creating enthusiasm and presents a platform for kids to have voice and play a meaningful role in reform. The traveling art exhibition explores media literacy themes and offers community groups, schools, and organizations the opportunity to explore and reflect on relevant, fundamental themes, and encourage essential social reform.
Project Girl Workshops have been developed to train the trainers. These workshops are for educators, girl group leaders, girl allies, and concerned parents. These half-day or full-day training workshops are designed to equip program facilitators with the necessary tools to successfully conduct independent Project Girl workshops.
Project Girl Supporting Curriculum Materials. To help spread the love and because Jane and I actually have families and lives of our own and can’t be all places at all times waving the Project Girl flag, we’ve created supportive and easy-to-use curriculum, companion DVDs and other workshop facilitation materials for girl allies and group leaders, educators, and concerned parents looking for help in navigating the sometimes choppy waters encountered when critically examining today’s popular culture and help attack the negative effects of media messages on the lives of adolescent girls. Done in collaboration with Lyn Mikel Brown, Ed.D., co-creator Hardy Girls Healthy Women, author of “Girlfighting” and “Packaging Girlhood” (with Sharon Lamb), Professor of Education, Colby College.
What is unique about Project Girl’s approach?
The media education movement in the U.S. focuses on kids as consumers of culture. The effort has been to change young persons from being passive viewers to being questioning consumers. While these efforts have created an indispensable foundation for all of us working in media education in the U.S. We believe that we need to broaden that role for our youth. Rather than limiting kids’ role to being mere consumers of our culture, we expect them to be reformers—the activists and the story tellers of their world. Their story is a real story—not a Hollywood contrived story. Youth participation in Project Girl is central and the girl’s ideas are paramount. This is the magical difference that defines Project Girl. This is art in action and this is the powerful difference. Project Girl is challenging issues that young people care about and are willing to give their time and energy to. The key to mobilizing young people giving young people leadership roles as organizers, planners, advocates and educators. The Project Girl art created by girls is the mobilizing component. The forceful expression. We seek out ways to shake up the status quo, share power with youth, and using the project girl traveling art exhibitions, community outreach programming, project girl workshops and the project girl curriculum. Project Girl promotes youth voices throughout communities in America. The goal of Project Girl is to make it possible for more girls to become smarter consumers of media. What makes Project Girl special and unique is its arts-based approach. We use art as a means to educate, inspire, reflect, and transform.
What’s your advice for girls today?
Advertisers will do just about anything to get you to buy their products including sales techniques that rely on illusion, deception, and false promises. The advertising messages and images created with these techniques are intended to get girls to react emotionally, rather than mindfully.
To explore the deception and trickery in advertising we focus on the image of the rat in the art collage (see attachment) the rat image becomes a reminder for the girls to always be suspicious “I think I smell a rat.” Advertisers aren’t concerned with helping girls. Their primary concern is to sell them products!
I would also suggest to girls to go to our website ProjectGirl.org
We have an online gallery, animations, interactive activities and our Project Girl workbook: A Guide to Un-Mediafying your life. This is a great place to learn about art, activism and creating change. We also have a Project Girl Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/ProjectGirl and a youtube channel: http://www.youtube/projectgirlusa
The media education movement in the U.S. focuses on kids as consumers of culture. The effort has been to change young persons from being passive viewers to being questioning consumers. While these efforts have created an indispensable foundation for all of us working in media education in the U.S. We believe that we need to broaden that role for our youth. Rather than limiting kids’ role to being mere critical consumers of our culture, we expect them to be reformers—the activists and the story tellers of their world. Their story is a real story—not a Hollywood contrived story. Youth participation in Project Girl is central and the girls’ ideas are paramount. This is the magical difference that defines Project Girl. This is art in action and this is the powerful difference.
Project Girl uses art as the vehicle to attract girls, to promote thoughtful dialogue, and to give girls the means to reflect and express their views. It challenges and gives girls the means to be producers of their own real culture, not just passive receivers of a culture that’s created for them to sell them products.
We’ve found through our workshops that the issues Project Girl is challenging are issues that young people care about and are willing to give their time and energy to. The key to mobilizing young people giving young people leadership roles as organizers, planners, advocates and educators. The Project Girl art created by girls is the mobilizing component. The forceful expression. We seek out ways to shake up the status quo, share power with youth, and using the project girl traveling art exhibitions, community outreach programming, project girl workshops and the project girl curriculum. Project Girl promotes youth voices throughout communities in America. The goal of Project Girl is to make it possible for more girls to become smarter consumers of media. What makes Project Girl special and unique is its arts-based approach. We use art as a means to educate, inspire, reflect, and transform.
Is it because we’re Mommies, as many, many Mommy Bloggers have suggested? Is it because we’re women?
Could it be . . .
We’re willing to work for free.
We lower the fair market value of all content with our free giveaways and product reviews?
We lower the fair market value of all advertising by charging measly rates for our sidebar advertising?
We’re confusing useless swag with actual cash? Both we pay taxes on and only one can pay a mortgage.
We’re behaving as if companies think we’re cool and popular when they contact us, instead of making them prove we’re economically valuable to their marketing strategy by paying us?
We have no ideas about how to charge consumers of our product for our insights?
We’ve lowered the fair market value of reporting and communicating to nearly zero with the behaviors above (writers – all of us – make less when everyone is willing to work for free)?
We’re condescending to each other, letting those junior high mean girls surface at times (Hillary v. Sarah 2008)?
Mommy Bloggers who undercharge and work for free make it harder for other Mommy Bloggers to charge for services. Show your sisters some respect. If we don’t value Mommy Blogger services – who will?
Our prices are so low that, really, no one in their right minds (not even us) can respect it?
Mommy Bloggers remind me of those dudes in flannel shirts who stand at the freeway exit with a sign that reads “Will Work for Food.” Except our signs say, “Will Work for Baby Food Samples and Lip Gloss”
As it happens, during this so-called “tough economy” Fortune 500 companies tripled their profits to $391 billion in 2009. They also slashed their payrolls by more than 800,000 jobs, according to The Washington Independent and CNBC.com.
They made $391 billion and you scored a knock-off Barbie doll for your daughter’s 10th birthday and $15 for an entire month of advertising on your sidebar.
Come on, Mommy Bloggers – grow a self-esteem.
The Girl Revolution’s only aim is to challenge the perceptions of femininity, to shift the perception of the value of girls and women. Upward.
These are old, out-dated, perceptions of the value of our labor that we’re falling in to.
What kind of example is this setting for the next generation of our girls, for their mothers to work for free? Do you want your daughter to believe her labor, talents, time, energy, perception, intuition, and brilliance – yes, brilliance – are worth nothing? Worthless?
We have to demand a great deal more respect, in the form of money, from those who see the opportunity and potential in our newfound freedom of speech, our newfound voice, and our newfound marketing value.
Think of The Black Eyed Peas next time someone asks you to work for free:
If you ain’t got no money, take your broke ass home!
Put this button on your blog as a message to corporate America. Then hit reply with an email about your FEES and RATES the next time someone asks you to do a giveaway or review for their product. Come back tomorrow to see my letter of rates. Yes, I’m publishing it on the Internet.
1 – They have no intention of making money and no business plan or strategy.
2 – They think they have to choose between making money or doing something with passion.
3 – They believe if they work from home, they have to take less than a junior high school baby-sitter would take in exchange for 90 hours a week of scrounging for links and page views. And they keep talking about how lucky they are for the same reason.
4 – They will let anyone change a contract on them for no reason whatsoever. They don’t negotiate contracts, they accept them.
5 – They work for imaginary future income potential instead of cold hard cash right now. “We’re a start up, so we can’t actually pay you, but we’ll give you the special honor of rolling out 7 posts an hour for nothing and maybe in the future, if we like you enough, we’ll think about paying you for working.” They feel thrilled for being chosen ahead of all the other suckers willing to work for free.
6 – They work for tuna, cup cakes, boxes of cereal, handbags, free trips, and invitations to parties. This is doubly stupid because they have to pay taxes on income they can’t pay their mortgage with. It’s usually stuff they would never spend money on. Again, they feel grateful for this arrangement.
7- They let advertisers advertise on their sites for free because they used the words “give-away.” They think they’ve struck gold when giving the opportunity “review” an item and give it away. Again, paying taxes on items and shouldering the full cost of producing and hosting a blog for special fancy mascara they would never buy.
8 – They feel popular when corporations – especially big corporations with lots of advertising and marketing dough – ask them to give themselves away for free. “I feel so honored to have been chosen!”
9 – They judge the success of their blogs by comments, links and page views instead of income.
10 – They do not value what they do and who they are enough to hit “reply” with a simple message about their consulting, advertising, public speaking, give-away, and spokesman fees. They are, in fact, more afraid of the potential rejection than they are of working for Chicklets and girdles. Here is what a letter like that looks like, Nice Girls Don’t Talk About Money.
, Mommy Bloggers and for goodness sake order it here so I can count it as income from my blog.
